No one can make you feel anything without your consent

 

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

That is a famous quote by the late Eleanor Roosevelt and one of my all time favourites. When I write it with chalkpen on the picture frame behind my chair in the clinic I put a line through inferior and write anything above it.

Because that is a fact.

No one can make you feel anything without your consent.

They can’t make you feel happy, they can’t make you feel sad, they can’t make you feel angry, nor any of the thousands of other feelings or emotions.

What happens when you feel happy, sad or angry is that you are reacting to something they have said or done. It is how you respond that is causing you the problem.

I know that is a tough one to get your head around.

In order to accept that it is your response that is causing you the problem you have to be able to come to grips with ‘the buck stops here’.

You can no longer play the role of the victim.

You can no longer go around blaming other people for the way you feel or the way your life has turned out.

That takes work.

That takes commitment.

That takes some deep inner work.

That takes an honest self-assessment and inventory.

I know because I was in that place of blaming everyone else for the way I felt and for the way my life was.

I was a victim.

I was angry and resentful. And most of the time I blamed my mother for all the negative things that happened to me. I was stuck in my past and it was a long hard road for me to get past that. You can read more about my story in my ebook.

My mission now is to help people to learn from my mistakes and not take the long road that I took. I want to spread the word that I have found a short cut. Something that is quick and painless and easy and it lasts.

The old paradigm of doing things the hard way belongs back in the last century. Things are quick and easy now.

Do what I say and not what I did could be my by line.

When you heal that part of you that reacts, the person can still do and say the same things, but it doesn’t hurt you anymore and then You. Don’t. React.

I like the analogy of someone ‘pushing your buttons’. With ThetaHealing® it’s about removing those buttons. Then, they can say what they like – hey, they can even jump up and down – but you won’t be triggered.

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Women of my generation have been taught to be perfectionists

We were taught that we need to be all things to all people

We were taught that to do something for ourselves,

to think of ourself was selfish … the very worst sin you could commit it seemed

Then you had people screaming that women can have it all

You could have children, be a mother AND have a high powered job

You could do anything and everything a man could do

What happened as a result of those high expectations was a generation of women who exhausted their bodies and their spirits trying to pack in all that they thought they were supposed to do

Be the 1950’s housewife with the perfect home & perfectly behaved children
and at the same time compete with men in the corporate world.

What an unsustainable, insurmountable goal that was!

In order to attempt to juggle all those balls in the air women had to sublimate their own needs to the needs of others.

When that happens our emotions have to shout louder and louder in order to get out attention

and because there is no time or space to focus on ourselves, plus we’ve been taught that to do so is wrong
thoughts and emotions get pushed further and further down
and that’s when the physical symptoms begin

[I read that martyrs experience chronic resentment – that was so me when my children were younger!]

When you look at this very simplified explanation you can see the problems this created,

both in my generation and the generations to follow.

Each generation tries to rebalance the wrongs they felt the previous generation inflicted upon them

I see the same things manifesting in my clients,
each generation having their own set of issues
and most of them say they feel stuck.

At the crux of all of it is the need
to be seen and heard, to be validated and acknowledged

and how quick the turnaround and change begins when that happens!

Focusing on yourself is not selfish,
experiencing pleasure is not selfish,
they are both crucial for vibrant health!

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