The benefit of goals versus resolutions

Well it has finally arrived ~ the last day of 2014!

I was going to write this blog days ago but time has passed by so quickly I got a shock to realize that today was New Years Eve.

My husband and I had the most wonderful Christmas in Melbourne surrounded by our children and grandchildren, we have been busy since the 20th. We drove to Melbourne, had a christening, minded our grand-dog (with the help of two nine year old boys), had Christmas, drove home, then up to Sydney for a 5th birthday party, home and now we have family staying ~ there has been no time for me to sit at the computer and write.

We are having extra visitors join us tonight for dinner and to then watch the fireworks over the road on the golf course. My fire pit is ready for us to release 2014 and call in 2015 ~ but first I need to write my list.

So here I am having shut myself away, thinking about the coming year and just what I want to get out of it.

As the year draws to a close we all talk about resolutions, how much weight we’re going to lose, what diet and exercise program we are thinking of starting, the book we are going to write ….. and then they are cast aside and forgotten just days into the new year.

After years of failed resolutions I now prefer to set goals. The word has a much nicer ring to it, it is something to strive for rather than a ‘do or die’ statement.

Often what happens is that we set the goal too high, like making the decision to run a marathon while we are lying on the lounge watching TV and eating ice-cream. We know that that is not going to happen in the next week or month and we give up before we ever start.

When we set ourself a goal, as long as it is reasonably achievable, then we tend to work towards making it happen. If I set the goal of running a marathon then that is not a realistic goal when I am lying on the lounge. I would need to bring it back and start from where I am now and take much smaller steps … start with getting up off the chair and walking around the block and then building that up until I was walking one kilometre and then building from there, to jogging one kilometre and so on.

I am sitting here thinking of what I would like to achieve this coming year.

So I start with a series of questions.

  • When I sit here on 31st December next year what do I want to have accomplished?
  • What impact do I want to make on the world?
  • How can I have a positive influence on other people’s lives?
  • What can I do to make me a better person?
  • What do I LOVE doing?
  • How could that have a positive impact on the world?

These are all questions to ask yourself when you are looking for goals.

Each year I have headings – Me; Healing Steps; my house; my relationships. Then I write my goals for each.

It makes very interesting reading when you read it back on New Years Eve to see how many you have achieved.

Instead let’s talk about setting goals. You can start with just one goal…what would you like to achieve in the next month?

Then the next month…and so on

What would you like your life to look like this time next year?

With what’s left of today … start writing down your goals. Once they are written down then close your eyes and feel what it would be like to have that in your life. Does it make you happy? If not then tweak it until it does. Once you start it gets easier.

You can still write them in January, don’t panic if you were too busy partying!

From my heart to yours I wish you all the best for 2015.

May it be filled with peace, love and joy.

May it bring you everything you wish for ~ and more!

and May you know a deep peace that resides in your very core.

Love & Blessings



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We were taught that to do something for ourselves,

to think of ourself was selfish … the very worst sin you could commit it seemed

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You could have children, be a mother AND have a high powered job

You could do anything and everything a man could do

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What an unsustainable, insurmountable goal that was!

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[I read that martyrs experience chronic resentment – that was so me when my children were younger!]

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both in my generation and the generations to follow.

Each generation tries to rebalance the wrongs they felt the previous generation inflicted upon them

I see the same things manifesting in my clients,
each generation having their own set of issues
and most of them say they feel stuck.

At the crux of all of it is the need
to be seen and heard, to be validated and acknowledged

and how quick the turnaround and change begins when that happens!

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